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| | | |-+  How to keep a positive outlook when partnerless ?
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Author Topic: How to keep a positive outlook when partnerless ?  (Read 2077 times)
dancingirldancing
Intermediate Bronze

Posts: 102


« Reply #15 on: October 25, 2009, 07:24:29 PM »

It is not a matter of not wanting to dance with older people or someone who is trained in different dance diciplines.

These are all fine when we are social dancing but for serious competitive dancing partner too much age and skills variances will be a big problem.

I do not find a lot of people in their 50's willingly put themselves competing in a serious competition against 20 or 30 years old. They would rather compete in masters or seniors category when they are actually competitive.

I can find a practice or social partner in a flash but to find someone who is willing to do 10 hours a week and on top of that compatible in age, height, skills, finances, coaching etc is a struggle. These are all very important factors in good serious competitive partnership unfortunately.

I can negotiate some of these factors but last time I partnered up with someone where I need to compromise too much it was a big disaster !

I really do not have the stamina to 'train' someone from stratch at the moment.

I do have the option of doing that atm but after the last experience I decided strongly against it. It will be a frustrating journey for both me and my partner.

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elisedance
Administrator
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ee


« Reply #16 on: October 31, 2009, 07:29:24 AM »

I think DGD iis unmistakably talking about a dance partner and not a romantic partner - I'm a bit surprised that you could read anything else into her message.  But maybe I misunderstood and you are replying to the title and not the previous post?

(BTW its a good idea to read the first post in a topic - thats the one that sets the subject the best even though it may wander)
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If you must leave the house, go build a home...

The limit of your love is also the limit of your art...
SwingWaltz
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Posts: 5772


« Reply #17 on: January 25, 2010, 10:23:09 AM »

Partnerless ... 1 week and counting.
What do I do? Photography  Roll Eyes

Ok...dancing wise, I've been to lots of social dances, and have been meeting some lovely young ladies whom I can dance with.  Wink
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elisedance
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« Reply #18 on: January 25, 2010, 03:31:54 PM »

Partnerless ... 1 week and counting.
What do I do? Photography  Roll Eyes

Ok...dancing wise, I've been to lots of social dances, and have been meeting some lovely young ladies whom I can dance with.  Wink

I'm confused SW - sounded in your other posts as if you had already found a new partner... whatsup??
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If you must leave the house, go build a home...

The limit of your love is also the limit of your art...
samina
Silver
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Posts: 1584



« Reply #19 on: January 25, 2010, 04:25:43 PM »

Partnerless ... 1 week and counting.
What do I do? Photography  Roll Eyes

Ok...dancing wise, I've been to lots of social dances, and have been meeting some lovely young ladies whom I can dance with.  Wink
reformulate your goals for the time being, and back them up with some action that feels good... focus on dance-related fitness, take yoga, go to a gyrotonic studio every week... learn some new drill you can do by yourself. and perhaps invest in a new dance circle, learn something new that will add a new dimension to what you already have in place, such as hip hop, AT, WCS, or salsa...

this time counts as much as any other. Smiley
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albanaich
Intermediate Bronze

Posts: 236


« Reply #20 on: January 25, 2010, 06:04:28 PM »

Or, life's to short to sit around not dancing. . . . .waiting for the 'right' partner.

And you know you cracked the age barrier when a young lady 30 years younger walks through a crowd of young bucks to dance with YOU. How's the song go? 'What a feeling!'

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FeZ5R3C5bzs&feature=fvw
« Last Edit: January 25, 2010, 06:13:26 PM by albanaich » Logged
samina
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Posts: 1584



« Reply #21 on: January 25, 2010, 06:43:54 PM »

one of my fave WCS social dancers is easily 30 years older than i am... great dancing has nothing to do with age. tho you do sound hyper-aware of age differences, alba. do you find yourself confusing social dance partnering with romantic connection, and feel troubled by that?
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albanaich
Intermediate Bronze

Posts: 236


« Reply #22 on: January 25, 2010, 08:32:44 PM »

I'm hyper-sensitve because I'm often the 'odd one out' age wise. It's ok in WCS, AT and MJ where I'm of an age with people and its a broad age group. In Ballroom there is a super abundance of very good young dancer who are both too young and too good. In Lindy they call me gramps :-)

And young men definitely do not like old guys who can dance better than them - they get really competive, and it can be embarrasing. I might not be competeing for the girls attention, they are.

And its very flattering to have the best dancer on the floor, age 20 or so, 'the dancing queen' make a point of asking you to dance - I don't deny it. Guilty!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uwLH7QTIEXU

Dancing with my son as 'wingman' few years back was a hysterically funny experience on all sorts of levels.

I've only had one bad experience, and that was nothing to do with me. That was a young ballroom dancer, who mixed up 'dance partner' with 'boyfriend' and that was really wierd. The converstation went something like.

'I am not your boyfriend, you cannot phone me to tell me you miss me, you do not get upset and angry because I don't call you - either you get a grip or our dance relationship was over. Unfortunately it had to end.

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QPO
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Adelaide South Australia


« Reply #23 on: January 25, 2010, 09:57:51 PM »

I think I will do teaching and still have lessons to make sure that my standard does not drop. men are in very short supply my way and without my loving partner V I dont know what would happen to my competitive dancing dreams. but I will want to share with others so I will focus on the teaching and promoting the sport in the state.
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SwingWaltz
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Posts: 5772


« Reply #24 on: January 25, 2010, 10:59:43 PM »

I'm confused SW - sounded in your other posts as if you had already found a new partner... whatsup??

We're just dancing around, I'm not 100% sure, she's not 100% sure. So I wouldn't call it a partnership yet, probably just someone to practise with.  Roll Eyes That's mutually agreed.
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elisedance
Administrator
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« Reply #25 on: January 26, 2010, 02:37:11 AM »

Then if you are not sure keep dancing with others too - because the expectation of a partnership develops very fast and you don't want to create more problems...

But please read my comment on the other topic on developing a partnership with a big skill disparity...
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If you must leave the house, go build a home...

The limit of your love is also the limit of your art...
SwingWaltz
Gold Star
***
Posts: 5772


« Reply #26 on: January 26, 2010, 03:14:59 AM »

Then if you are not sure keep dancing with others too - because the expectation of a partnership develops very fast and you don't want to create more problems...

But please read my comment on the other topic on developing a partnership with a big skill disparity...

Thank you!  Smiley
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QPO
reg mods
Continental Champion
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Posts: 20818


Adelaide South Australia


« Reply #27 on: January 30, 2010, 12:53:18 AM »

I think learning to teach for you is a good way to keep you connected to the dancing... Cool
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Dance is a delicate balance between perfection and beauty.  ~Author Unknown
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phoenix13
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Posts: 3359



« Reply #28 on: June 18, 2013, 09:58:10 PM »

I've known of more than a few people who groomed a much lower level dancer into a viable partner.
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Dona nobis pacem.
elisedance
Administrator
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ee


« Reply #29 on: June 19, 2013, 09:19:20 AM »

I've known of more than a few people who groomed a much lower level dancer into a viable partner.
yes, its possible - but whats likely to happen is once they start to be good they run off with a younger, less able dancer.  And then you've wasted years training someone to dance for free.
Sound familiar?  Tongue
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If you must leave the house, go build a home...

The limit of your love is also the limit of your art...
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