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Author Topic: Teacher-student favoritism  (Read 2817 times)
MusicChica
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« on: May 02, 2009, 07:03:47 PM »

This came up in the "Affairs of the heart" thread, and I thought it deserved a place of its own, since so many of us seem to have experienced it.

Have any of your teachers (middle school, high school, college professors, dance teachers, etc.) shown favoritism?  Have you been one of the favorites or one of the non-favorites?  Or were you removed from the situation entirely but witnessed it?

EDIT:  And for the teachers amongst us, have you ever played favorites?  If you have, have you shown it outwardly to your students, or do you think they noticed?

My high school choir director was quite obvious and rather cruel about it, and it was the largest single factor in making my high school years miserable.  More recently, a former dance teacher played favorites a bit, and although that wasn't the reason I ultimately left him, it did cause a rift between myself and one of his other students.  She didn't think he played favorites at all, but of course she failed to realize that she was his #1 favorite of all.

Anyway, what are your experiences with favoritism in a teacher-student relationship?
« Last Edit: May 02, 2009, 07:40:37 PM by MusicChica » Logged
elisedance
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« Reply #1 on: May 02, 2009, 07:06:26 PM »

interesting question with dancing - particularly in the pro-am world.  The point is that partners are never of equal training, talent or committment and the question is shouldn't the teacher favor the top student? 

I actually feel one can earn a higher regard - but maybe thats not favoritism?
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Lioness
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« Reply #2 on: May 02, 2009, 10:08:14 PM »

I think I've quite often been a favourite of teachers (not the only one) at school because I'm quite and I enjoy my work.

Dance-wise...current coach shows massive amounts of favouritism because he sees us as the ones with the most potential. It's actually starting to annoy us, as well as the other couples in the class (there are 2 of them) because he hardly ever spends time teaching them technique, only steps. We get annoyed because he doesn't teach us enough steps and harps on about technique in ways we can't understand and that are wrong anyway. I can't count how many times we've gotten the 'well, the book says this' lecture when we've asked about something. The other's don't get that, they just get shown how to do it.
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Dora-Satya Veda
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« Reply #3 on: May 02, 2009, 10:12:34 PM »

School....well never mind.

In dancing I had 4 teachers that treated me as their favorite. It was my dance father, dance mother and my favorite aunt and uncle. I did help them with things outside of dancing making them appreciate me being around.
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QPO
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« Reply #4 on: May 03, 2009, 12:29:12 AM »

I think teachers are often attracted to people or couples that they feel try really hard or remind them of themselves...Its human nature. And if a student spend alot of their money with you as a teacher I think you tend to give more of yourself also...
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QPO
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« Reply #5 on: May 03, 2009, 12:30:08 AM »

I think I've quite often been a favourite of teachers (not the only one) at school because I'm quite and I enjoy my work.

Dance-wise...current coach shows massive amounts of favouritism because he sees us as the ones with the most potential. It's actually starting to annoy us, as well as the other couples in the class (there are 2 of them) because he hardly ever spends time teaching them technique, only steps. We get annoyed because he doesn't teach us enough steps and harps on about technique in ways we can't understand and that are wrong anyway. I can't count how many times we've gotten the 'well, the book says this' lecture when we've asked about something. The other's don't get that, they just get shown how to do it.



Lips sealed
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Vagabond
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« Reply #6 on: May 03, 2009, 01:11:53 AM »

I think I've quite often been a favourite of teachers (not the only one) at school because I'm quite and I enjoy my work.

Dance-wise...current coach shows massive amounts of favouritism because he sees us as the ones with the most potential. It's actually starting to annoy us, as well as the other couples in the class (there are 2 of them) because he hardly ever spends time teaching them technique, only steps. We get annoyed because he doesn't teach us enough steps and harps on about technique in ways we can't understand and that are wrong anyway. I can't count how many times we've gotten the 'well, the book says this' lecture when we've asked about something. The other's don't get that, they just get shown how to do it.
Your teacher sees you as his vehicle to get acknowledgement by others better equipped pro's, fame if you like!

Some students love this form of attention both most don't. It can also cost you dearly since you have to "unlearn" all you have be thought wrongly and man that takes twice the time
« Last Edit: May 03, 2009, 01:15:22 AM by Vagabond » Logged

Dancing with the feet is one thing, but dancing with the heart is another.
MusicChica
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« Reply #7 on: May 03, 2009, 01:31:00 AM »

And see, there's a difference between giving a different sort of attention to your more promising couples and being totally mentally absent in lessons with one student over another.  That's what I'm getting at here--is the teacher not giving him- or herself evenly to all students, when differing levels are accounted for?
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QPO
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« Reply #8 on: May 03, 2009, 01:41:41 AM »

It is hard and we are all fallible....In the end if you feel you are being short done by, you need to look at another teacher, they may give you what you want. I was always worried about moving but know. I am the customer and I will choose where I get my instruction from.
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elisedance
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« Reply #9 on: May 03, 2009, 06:21:56 AM »

I think I've quite often been a favourite of teachers (not the only one) at school because I'm quite and I enjoy my work.

Dance-wise...current coach shows massive amounts of favouritism because he sees us as the ones with the most potential. It's actually starting to annoy us, as well as the other couples in the class (there are 2 of them) because he hardly ever spends time teaching them technique, only steps. We get annoyed because he doesn't teach us enough steps and harps on about technique in ways we can't understand and that are wrong anyway. I can't count how many times we've gotten the 'well, the book says this' lecture when we've asked about something. The other's don't get that, they just get shown how to do it.

think of it as a practise session - and get yourselves a new teacher as soon as it is possible.  You have to respect a teacher else you can not learn.
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QPO
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« Reply #10 on: May 03, 2009, 06:30:20 AM »

yes that is a high priority to find a new teacher, the problem is money, but there are options available for better instruction, but they not straight forward but at the end you have to evaluate what is important... Always tough in Lioness's predicament
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Vagabond
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« Reply #11 on: May 03, 2009, 06:33:25 AM »

It is easy to find a teacher its hard to find a master
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SwingWaltz
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« Reply #12 on: May 03, 2009, 09:24:33 AM »

Hehe I'm guilty of it...well I kind of have a crush on that girl....ok, honestly I have the biggest crush on her. SIGH
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Vagabond
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« Reply #13 on: May 03, 2009, 07:53:38 PM »

And there is the issue of "being comfortable" with a certain style of teaching/learning. I find that nowadays people can't take a comment for what they are, a comment. If they get told they did something wrong it upsets them.

Coaches have to bring the news softly, softly which at times makes it hard for the teacher to get his/her message through. People get upset for the most silly reasons, don't get me wrong I don't liked to be barked at either but there is a middle ground.
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Dancing with the feet is one thing, but dancing with the heart is another.
elisedance
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« Reply #14 on: May 03, 2009, 09:22:24 PM »

It is easy to find a teacher its hard to find a master
and harder to find a mentor....
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If you must leave the house, go build a home...

The limit of your love is also the limit of your art...
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