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Author Topic: Dealing with nuisances at social dances ...  (Read 1715 times)
elisedance
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« Reply #15 on: July 10, 2013, 09:57:54 PM »

like I said, he sounds like a conductor Tongue
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phoenix13
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« Reply #16 on: July 10, 2013, 10:16:01 PM »

lol.  True.  True.
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elisedance
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« Reply #17 on: September 17, 2013, 07:57:58 AM »

probably the best way is a quiet - and insistent - No thankyou.
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Burgess Penguin
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« Reply #18 on: November 26, 2013, 03:11:02 PM »

One MAJOR pet peeve with me is a partner who uses the deathgrip, makes it very difficult to lead, if not painful. I have gotten to the point I will NOT hesitate to let a partner know they're holding on way too tight. After nearly getting my little finger pulled out of its socket by a reckless partner, I learned my lesson.

This past week at a social dance, there was this one lady who just would NOT leave me alone, there were just some dances I just plain had no desire to do and wanted to pause for the next. Happened a lot during the night. I would humor her at times but dancing with her quite honestly was NOT worth the aggravation. Started to feel like I was being stalked almost. Normally I do the lions share of my dancing with my SO, but also dance with other folks (she's out of town right now), but man this was ridiculous. I kept declining more than I accepted with her, and it just didn't get through. She could see that I was leaving for the night and demanded that I do a tango with  her, which I grudgingly did (hard for me because with anyone else I LOVE tango) and then put my foot down once and for all that I was leaving, and she just could not seem to accept that. Not sure I'll return to that venue for a bit. Boy if I run into her again at another dance and my SO is there, chances are good that I will accept NO dances with her at all. Sorry to come off so blunt but I have my limits.

At a couple social dances, me and my SO have encountered this one young guy who definitely comes off as the full of himself player/ladies man type. He just seems to think EVERY lady in the place is fair game, married or not. To top it off, he tends to be a bit rough on the ladies while leading (too hard a grip, arm twisting etc). Add to that, he just seems to love the sound of his own voice and his jive-talk. He doesn't bother us 2 anymore because if we see him coming, we make no contact with him of any sort, he moves on to other potential victims. Just irks me that he has ZERO comprehension of acceptable behavior in a social dance situation.

Only thing I encountered close to a drunk was actually a meth-head at one dance who was trying to pick up every guy in the place. She never returned after that.

All said though, I am a lot more direct than I used to be with some things, and do NOT get me started on dance snobs GRRRRRRRRR!



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elisedance
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« Reply #19 on: November 26, 2013, 09:07:42 PM »

Two socio(path) types in there BP: the hang-on-for-lifer follow (terrified of falling over so hangs on for life) and the leading-is-forcing lead (actually thinks that that's how dancing is supposed to be, muscle) and we've all encountered them.  As you say the only way to deal with them is to avoid, avoid, avoid....
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millitiz
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« Reply #20 on: March 02, 2014, 11:43:35 PM »

Being a bit late to the party - life certainly looks different with a work over there. I solute all those people dancing when working OMG.

It sounds like BP's experience on death grip is on guy's left hand - where my more memorable ones are on my right arm. I personally don't really have any good solution beside praying the music to finish faster...

My current way to deal with most/many nuisances is to relax. By that I mean if my partner isn't moving, I don't, too. If she is relaxing her arms onto my arms, I relax mine, too. If you are chatting, I...ok, I might talk a bit. But I really think that that is a bad idea - as in calling someone when driving kind of bad idea. if she couldn't make the full turns, I would make it up to match her. Life looks quite different when I am more "sitting back."
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elisedance
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« Reply #21 on: March 03, 2014, 04:46:30 AM »

That's a very courteous way of dealing with a Kling-on!  [Hey, I think we have a term!]  Certainly beats stamping on their foot anyway.  And probably most effective because some cases of Klingon are due to the woman feeling insecure - which could be a reflection in part of your dance approach.  Its particularly interesting that BP's Klingons are on the left and yours on the right - might be worth looking at both of your respective arms (and total frame) to see if there is something that could be improved to make her more secure. 

But slowing things down and relaxing is surely the way to go - could turn a Klingon into a Karesson!
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Rugby
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« Reply #22 on: April 30, 2014, 04:47:43 PM »

LOL, yeah I have danced with the Klingers, the Pushers, the Pullers, the Bouncers, the Pump Handlers, the Crushers and the Need a Jump Start to Movers.
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elisedance
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« Reply #23 on: May 17, 2014, 06:23:35 PM »

LOL, yeah I have danced with the Klingers, the Pushers, the Pullers, the Bouncers, the Pump Handlers, the Crushers and the Need a Jump Start to Movers.
ROLF!  I think you nailed them all.

Except prince charming, you didn't mention him... Oh yes I know why Roll Eyes
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If you must leave the house, go build a home...

The limit of your love is also the limit of your art...
Rugby
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« Reply #24 on: May 21, 2014, 02:50:16 AM »

 Grin
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Everyone tries to rush up through the syllabus levles and think once they are at the top they have arrived.  What they don't realize is that by doing this it is like skimming through a book, you may get the gist but you will never understand the story.
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