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Author Topic: Partnership age differences  (Read 3064 times)
elisedance
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« on: April 20, 2011, 05:36:35 AM »

A couple of members have mentioned a large age difference between them and their DP.  Are there any additional challenges that this makes?  For example goals, practicalities or expenses.
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QPO
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« Reply #1 on: April 20, 2011, 09:41:53 AM »

Well I dont have a problem with the age difference either way, as long as you are both compatible and have the same goals.
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ttd
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« Reply #2 on: April 20, 2011, 10:50:05 AM »

It depends on where people are in their life as well. I.e. if you happen to live in a university town and decide to partner a younger college student, they will eventually graduate and move, and you will be in the same position as you started. You may well have same shorter-term dance goals (like for the next 2-4 years), but in the long run the partnership is not going to work because the younger individual has to get on with the rest of their life.
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elisedance
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« Reply #3 on: April 20, 2011, 11:33:58 AM »

It depends on where people are in their life as well. I.e. if you happen to live in a university town and decide to partner a younger college student, they will eventually graduate and move, and you will be in the same position as you started. You may well have same shorter-term dance goals (like for the next 2-4 years), but in the long run the partnership is not going to work because the younger individual has to get on with the rest of their life.

well, then they have thier priorities wrong!  Tongue
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ttd
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« Reply #4 on: April 20, 2011, 12:20:24 PM »

It depends on where people are in their life as well. I.e. if you happen to live in a university town and decide to partner a younger college student, they will eventually graduate and move, and you will be in the same position as you started. You may well have same shorter-term dance goals (like for the next 2-4 years), but in the long run the partnership is not going to work because the younger individual has to get on with the rest of their life.

well, then they have thier priorities wrong!  Tongue
Or maybe they have them right and want to move someplace with a bigger dance scene.
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elisedance
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« Reply #5 on: April 20, 2011, 01:04:47 PM »

It depends on where people are in their life as well. I.e. if you happen to live in a university town and decide to partner a younger college student, they will eventually graduate and move, and you will be in the same position as you started. You may well have same shorter-term dance goals (like for the next 2-4 years), but in the long run the partnership is not going to work because the younger individual has to get on with the rest of their life.

well, then they have thier priorities wrong!  Tongue
Or maybe they have them right and want to move someplace with a bigger dance scene.

Ah yes, dump the old partner and get a sporty new model...
..... the dancer is always greener on the other side of the floor...

(but beware the 'greener' double entendre.. Wink )
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Some guy
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« Reply #6 on: April 20, 2011, 02:55:48 PM »

Ha ha!  Good one Elise. 
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ttd
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« Reply #7 on: April 20, 2011, 04:34:10 PM »

True, the grass is always greener somewhere else. But surely you can see how someone young might not want to settle in a small town far away from bigger hubs just for the sake of a dance partnership? Not to mention that being in a small town away from bigger hubs makes it harder to access dance opportunities easily available elsewhere? But that's something those who are no longer easily mobile (being married does that to you) have to consider when they are thinking about teaming up with a college student for dance purposes - that they might move on you sooner rather than later.
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SwingWaltz
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« Reply #8 on: April 25, 2011, 05:12:50 AM »

ttd has made a really good point regarding to uni students.

I've just moved to a new city (small city mind you) only because I'm attending uni here. Doing my PhD in immunology, a 3-4 year degree. It's almost given that I will move overseas or a different city after I finish my degree to do a post-doc. My dance partner is still in highschool and will graduate about the same time I finish my PhD (we're talking about a 8 year age difference here). So it's almost inevitable that our partnership will come to an end after 3-4 years. That is still longer than any of the partnerships I've ever had.

So do you just dance for today and worry about tomorrow only when it comes.  Roll Eyes
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Lioness
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« Reply #9 on: April 25, 2011, 05:49:36 AM »

I say yes, because, well, having a 3-4 year partner is still better than having no partner at all.
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elisedance
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« Reply #10 on: April 25, 2011, 07:09:59 AM »

I agree.  Besides, who knows what might happen.  You may have personal reasons to stay in the area or if the partnership really takes off she might decide to go to college where you are.  There's no knowing what the future will bring and you can really screw up by avoiding what looks like the inevitable...

The adage: 'Eat and be merry for tomorrow we die' actually has a positive aspect to it... Wink
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If you must leave the house, go build a home...

The limit of your love is also the limit of your art...
QPO
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« Reply #11 on: April 26, 2011, 12:32:36 AM »

I agree... you have to take what is available now and deal with 3-4 year or 2-3 etc. SW & I know of a partnership where the husband left his wife to dance with another, very sad for the wife as she is a really lovely person and she is now without a partner.
 
I did see the husband dance on the week-end and he has improved but his Younger partner does sell the dancing.....she is still married!!!!!! and well not sure how long that will be for. He looks at her so besotted and they are very cuddly together....  the grass is greener?Huh Roll Eyes
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« Reply #12 on: April 26, 2011, 10:53:06 AM »

He looks at her so besotted and they are very cuddly together....  the grass is greener?Huh Roll Eyes
How sad for the wife.  I hope there's something we don't know and that the situation is actually better than it seems. 

"The grass is always greener over the septic tank" - Erma Bombeck.
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elisedance
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« Reply #13 on: April 26, 2011, 11:38:02 AM »

"The grass is always greener over the septic tank" - Erma Bombeck.
LOL!

"still runs the water where the sludge is thick"
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If you must leave the house, go build a home...

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Rugby
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« Reply #14 on: April 26, 2011, 09:58:46 PM »

A couple of members have mentioned a large age difference between them and their DP.  Are there any additional challenges that this makes?  For example goals, practicalities or expenses.


All three.  In the end the age difference can be a problem, especially as you get older it starts to become more of an issue.
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