'Looking strong'

[drj]

To say that the woman does not have to follow is, I think, to contradict almost everything that is on this forum previously..... (body school too)

You might be surprised.   

Might? Will.

[elisedance]

To say that the woman does not have to follow is, I think, to contradict almost everything that is on this forum previously..... (body school too)

You might be surprised.   

See PM...

[Some guy]

Might? Will.

[Dora-Satya Veda]

I was always taught to never follow a man both by my mother and by all my dance teachers. I also have to say that most of my students are also taught to never follow their partner or any man for that matter. 

DSV

[elisedance]

I was always taught to never follow a man both by my mother and by all my dance teachers. I also have to say that most of my students are also taught to never follow their partner or any man for that matter. 

DSV

So what do you tell them to do??

[TangoDancer]

OK, don't everyone faint at once.     Firstly, let me say that I have missed you all, greatly... been on a special assignment since May that has all but consumed me, and kept me from participating 100%. Secondly, thanks so very much to SG for coming to get me, and saying that my input would be appreciated on this thread. You made an 'old coach' feel good.   

OK. I've read the thread, and here are my initial thoughts.....

1. SG pm'd me, I believe, because he has heard me say, "One of the first things I say to students, new and not, is 'The last thing I ever want you to do is follow me. Don't ever follow your partner!' ". I am emphatic about it. If the lady is following the man, for ex., then she is subjected only to his perception/s of the movement. If this were the intention, then why is she there? I understand where ED and her partner are (where she is focusing on being a better follow and this is helping their partnership). Yet, I propose to ED that she understands enough about dance to know that although she may be concentrating on feeling his intentions better, that this allows her to move more synergistically, which, in turn, allows him to... here it comes... follow her better, which allows him to lead more effectively, and on it goes. The man indicates a direction; the lady follows the movement (not the man); and, the man follows the lady to the completion of the direction. And, the cycle begins again.

2. Sam and SG are spot on in their perceptions of strength. ......"strength" is related to how fully i inhabit my body.....  I believe it was ED who said that a strong dancer and a strong partnership are 2 completely different things. Yet, even here, IMO, a strong partnership literally means how fully each partner inhabits their bodies, and commands the desired intention... in harmony with one another. Other things like connection, confidence, physical strength, speed, sharpness, etc., when done well and properly, are then characteristics of a strong dancer. Even at the top levels, we can see which couples are good because they are both strong dancers and dance well together, and which are both dancers dancing strongly and well at the same time. Both couples look great, but only one is special.

I guess the obvious next point is, how does one achieve this sense of strentgh in follow -- to be both independent yet connected at the same time? I'll defer to your thoughts, first. Glad to be back.   

[Some guy]

So great to have you back TD!  I don't think I'm the only one that missed you here!  You input is invaluable as usual. 

DSV, your sister makes absolutely sure that her lady students don't follow their men.  This makes them strong women, inside and out, and that strength is severely compromised when they attempt to follow the man.  The ladies who don't follow are able to inject an energy into the partnership that's just surreal.

[elisedance]

TD - you were too slow, I had to pick my self up - fortunately only from the couch that I was sitting on!  Welcome back

[TangoDancer]

TD - you were too slow, I had to pick my self up - fortunately only from the couch that I was sitting on!  Welcome back

Thanks so much. That's the story of my life. My college roommate told me that there are only 2 kinds of guys in this world... the quick, and the left out. I guess I'm still getting up to speed.   

[elisedance]

My college roommate told me that there are only 2 kinds of guys in this world... the quick, and the left out.

I like it.  I hope your college mate is still quick...

[samina]

So glad to see you back, TD!!! I wonder'd where you got off to.

1. SG pm'd me, I believe, because he has heard me say, "One of the first things I say to students, new and not, is 'The last thing I ever want you to do is follow me. Don't ever follow your partner!' ". I am emphatic about it. If the lady is following the man, for ex., then she is subjected only to his perception/s of the movement. If this were the intention, then why is she there? I understand where ED and her partner are (where she is focusing on being a better follow and this is helping their partnership). Yet, I propose to ED that she understands enough about dance to know that although she may be concentrating on feeling his intentions better, that this allows her to move more synergistically, which, in turn, allows him to... here it comes... follow her better, which allows him to lead more effectively, and on it goes. The man indicates a direction; the lady follows the movement (not the man); and, the man follows the lady to the completion of the direction. And, the cycle begins again.

This is what I've been taught and has felt right in every dance style I've tried. The beautiful end product is what the two create together from the mix of their conversation of energies! I just love that... But it has not come easy for me. Not at all... it's been a profound personal journey of transformation to find this, whereas I know many "natural" dancers can express themselves more freely, more easily. I guess the benefit of things coming with such effort is that one acquires awareness and understanding, which makes for good teachers down the road.

Perhaps this is why you are such a good coach, TD? I don't know... I gather you actually have quite a lot of "natural" entertainer in you, so perhaps not. But for me, I'm so creatively shy, being put on the spot to emphatically contribute something creatively on the dance floor is a Big Deal.  

a strong partnership literally means how fully each partner inhabits their bodies, and commands the desired intention... in harmony with one another.

My sense of it as well.

I guess the obvious next point is, how does one achieve this sense of strentgh in follow -- to be both independent yet connected at the same time? I'll defer to your thoughts, first. Glad to be back.  

For me, TD, increasing my ability to inhabit my body freely, with fluid sensation and awareness, continues to be my first priority, because my experience increasingly tells me that when this is "there", then one has all the tools necessary to show up and be a great partner. One is "present", one has inner stillness because there isn't a blocked or disturbed physical or mental energy, and so in that quiet one can "hear" what one's partner is conveying with their own body-being. I've come to see absolutely everything as secondary to how I inhabit my body with this awareness.

But then, when I connect with my partner, it feels as if we are plugging into each other's nervous systems, and sending energy & information back & forth between the two. So there's a receptivity and a sending energy happening at the same time, and that feels like tremendous "aliveness" between the two. When both partners have that spaciousness of being present in their bodies, then the intuitive dialogue that occurs transcends anything linear or left-brain. The more fully they inhabit their bodies with their beings, the more presence & sensitivity they have, and therefore the more fluid their passing of information back & forth.

They enter into a kind of "spherical communication" together, with different dimensions of information coming into play with the dance all at once -- weight transfer, body rotation, touch through the hands, and non-physical sensibilities as well, such as intuition. When I have felt this, I feel a direct connection between his hands (the communion between his & mine) and my toes, as well as through my core, and my mind is still, and things flow without thought, and there is a tremendous amount of aliveness all throughout my body as everything comes into play.

That's my sense of it, anyway. And as I said... it always gets back to this physical body and working on enlivening my experience of being "in" it. Because the more I do that, the more my experience of dance completely transforms. And when it feels heavy or blocked... oof... I do not find that pleasant at all, I bring so much less to the "energetic conversation" with my partner.  

[emeralddancer]

Missed you TD. I may not be on much interacting but always reading. AND I always look for your posts. =)